You guys were SO in love. Everything was perfect. There were talks of marriage, babies, growing old together. And BOOM. Everything DONE UP! And you’re sitting there like “Man what the hell? Things were going so well. Maybe if I …. Or if I didn’t … “

Yeah. Most of us have been there and done that. And it sucks! Sleepless nights, puffy eyes, no appetite … love is a scary game to lose in. But there’s something called LIFE. You gata get up and continue to live yours. You really think he’s  sittin’ up at  home, curled up with a Danielle Steel novel worrying about you? And do you really think she’s drowning her sorrows in that 2,313,141 litre bottle of Grey Goose. Hell to THE no. So I would suggest you get off your backside and live ya damn life.

But what happens when they send that fateful text: “Hey, wassup?” Two words. Three syllables. A PLETHORA of meanings. Does this mean they wanna chill, make up, be friends, have sex? Did they FINALLY realize that they made a mistake?! YES! YESSSSSSSS! All is not lost! No, you fool. What this probably is, is a leeway to converting you into a cutta.

It’s so easy to be a cutta for your ex. So familiar. Comfortable. Easy. It doesn’t even feel wrong. Then you start to think, “Maybe if we do this more often, he’d remember why we were so in love,” No, donkey. If he wanted to remember that he would have never left in the first place! And trust me, I know the lies we feed ourselves:

One day he’ll remember why we were so in love.

I’ll just give him more time.

I’ll stay single just in case he wants to come back.

Girl you better TRY hard move the HELL on. To be honest, in more instances, the only way to really get over someone is to end all communication with them. The back and forth is stifling and so very tiring. You may think you’re strong enough to handle being their “friend” but you will more than likely end up in their bed being all “friendly”. Especially if you know you’re still in love with him.

If the man ended it with you, let him live with his decision. If he wants you back for REAL, you’d know. And no, just because he says “I miss you” in a text means that it’s genuine. If you truly believe with all your heart that this man is sorry (and you’ve put him through the ropes), then go for it. Your heart, not mine. But I will say it is VERY rare that this happens. A man that knows what he has, when he has it, hardly needs any reassuring. And chances are, that scumbag probably dumped you for a pretty face and when he found out that she was NOTHING to compare to you, came running back.

Don’t be someone’s doormat.  Maintain your dignity. Keep your pride. Guard your heart. At the end of the day, YOU are all you have.