Let me tell y’all somethin’ about life. This thing is SO funny. The people that you look down on today can very well be the very same people you’ll need tomorrow, or even today for that matter.
I met this young man a few years back, we really hit it off. Became good friends even. If I wanted an intelligent conversation or positive feedback on something I’d call him. Nice right? I know! Fast forward to about a year later, he begins to gain some kind of “fame” I guess he thought and because I didn’t offer any immediate assistance to his rise, he decided it was best to ignore my phone calls, text messages and instant messages. Hmmm, okay. Oh, and then he says it’s because he’s networking right now and he doesn’t have time to build any personal relationships because his “career” comes first. Wow. Umm, okay. Again.
So being the human I am, I was really hurt. But I chalked it up to another one of life’s lessons and experiences. Now fast forward to about 2 years later, which would be last year. He’s found his “fame”. GOOD FOR YOU BRUH! Good for you. I’m real proud. And being the silly goat that I am, I took it upon myself to find my “friend” and congratulate him on his successes. But lo and friggin’ behold, I get exactly what I was looking for. So I go up to this dude to hug him and because he’s with his new “network” all of a sudden I’m ghetto trash. What the hell?! Oh, I’m sorry my daddy isn’t so and so, and I didn’t go to the most prestigious high school, and I’m really sorry that I didn’t finish college abroad. Wow. This negro had the audacity to give me the church hug. You know the one? Like I’ve been diagnosed with flippin’ leprosy or somethin’. Nigga you must have just lost your damn mind!
But ya know what? I’m a trooper. I really am. I waved it off with a smile and this time I wasn’t hurt. I was LIVID! But I’m a pretty civil person. I didn’t turn tables over and say how silly he looked in his sweater vest and chinos. Nahhhh, I went back to my friends and called it a night. So I’m heading to my car and just as I was turning the key I hear these voices, “Oh my God, he really think he’s in. He’s such an idiot.” And bursts of laughter. I look behind me and lo and behold, it’s the Almighty Network! Well, they may not be talking about my [old] friend so I started to get in my car. But then they call his name and added on to it a really nasty nickname. So being the sissy I am, I felt bad for my friend. So I called him up and was like “Bro, these people you think are your friends really aren’t. Believe me.” And you know this douchebag had the nerve to cuss me out? Okay sucka. I hope they make you look like an even bigger ass!
Now fast forward to THIS year. I’m minding my own business. Doot doot de doot. And the phone at my desk rings.
“Hey hun, how are you?”
“Uhhhhh, hi. Who’s this?”
“Come on now Carra, this ya boy [insert name here]”
“Oh. Umm. Wow. Hi. How ya been?”
“I’ve been good man. I miss you.”
“Really? Okay. Thanks.”
“Yeah man. We really oughta do lunch one day. To catch up and stuff.”
“Oh yeah. Okay. Cool. I think.”
“Yeah. Oh by the way. I didn’t know you wrote for this magazine.”
SKERCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH! LOL. OMG! No you did NOT just go there. So ALL of a sudden we’re friends again because I write for this magazine and you think I can do “Stuff” for you now? But wait! It gets BETTER!
“Umm, yeah I do. So?”
“So maybe you can talk to the guys there. I really wanna …”
“Hold up a minute! Hold on. How long you been ingnorin’ my phone calls and text messages now allllll of a sudden we COOL and you can just ask me to do stuff for you?”
“No come on sweetheart, you know it ain like ..”
“Ain’t like what? How’s about you not call me anymore eh? Thanks and have a great day.”
Now needless to say, I do feel bad for saying that but it felt so liberating at the same time! How dare you think it’s okay to ignore me for almost 2 years and come back because you wanna use me? Flippin’ opportunist. And NO, I do NOT wanna write ANYTHING with you. And YES I know my Blog’s becoming popular but I refuse to let you in on ANY of my ideas and dreams. Didn’t need you then and I certainly don’t need you now. Douche.
Deuces!
I met this young man a few years back, we really hit it off. Became good friends even. If I wanted an intelligent conversation or positive feedback on something I’d call him. Nice right? I know! Fast forward to about a year later, he begins to gain some kind of “fame” I guess he thought and because I didn’t offer any immediate assistance to his rise, he decided it was best to ignore my phone calls, text messages and instant messages. Hmmm, okay. Oh, and then he says it’s because he’s networking right now and he doesn’t have time to build any personal relationships because his “career” comes first. Wow. Umm, okay. Again.
So being the human I am, I was really hurt. But I chalked it up to another one of life’s lessons and experiences. Now fast forward to about 2 years later, which would be last year. He’s found his “fame”. GOOD FOR YOU BRUH! Good for you. I’m real proud. And being the silly goat that I am, I took it upon myself to find my “friend” and congratulate him on his successes. But lo and friggin’ behold, I get exactly what I was looking for. So I go up to this dude to hug him and because he’s with his new “network” all of a sudden I’m ghetto trash. What the hell?! Oh, I’m sorry my daddy isn’t so and so, and I didn’t go to the most prestigious high school, and I’m really sorry that I didn’t finish college abroad. Wow. This negro had the audacity to give me the church hug. You know the one? Like I’ve been diagnosed with flippin’ leprosy or somethin’. Nigga you must have just lost your damn mind!
But ya know what? I’m a trooper. I really am. I waved it off with a smile and this time I wasn’t hurt. I was LIVID! But I’m a pretty civil person. I didn’t turn tables over and say how silly he looked in his sweater vest and chinos. Nahhhh, I went back to my friends and called it a night. So I’m heading to my car and just as I was turning the key I hear these voices, “Oh my God, he really think he’s in. He’s such an idiot.” And bursts of laughter. I look behind me and lo and behold, it’s the Almighty Network! Well, they may not be talking about my [old] friend so I started to get in my car. But then they call his name and added on to it a really nasty nickname. So being the sissy I am, I felt bad for my friend. So I called him up and was like “Bro, these people you think are your friends really aren’t. Believe me.” And you know this douchebag had the nerve to cuss me out? Okay sucka. I hope they make you look like an even bigger ass!
Now fast forward to THIS year. I’m minding my own business. Doot doot de doot. And the phone at my desk rings.
“Hey hun, how are you?”
“Uhhhhh, hi. Who’s this?”
“Come on now Carra, this ya boy [insert name here]”
“Oh. Umm. Wow. Hi. How ya been?”
“I’ve been good man. I miss you.”
“Really? Okay. Thanks.”
“Yeah man. We really oughta do lunch one day. To catch up and stuff.”
“Oh yeah. Okay. Cool. I think.”
“Yeah. Oh by the way. I didn’t know you wrote for this magazine.”
SKERCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH! LOL. OMG! No you did NOT just go there. So ALL of a sudden we’re friends again because I write for this magazine and you think I can do “Stuff” for you now? But wait! It gets BETTER!
“Umm, yeah I do. So?”
“So maybe you can talk to the guys there. I really wanna …”
“Hold up a minute! Hold on. How long you been ingnorin’ my phone calls and text messages now allllll of a sudden we COOL and you can just ask me to do stuff for you?”
“No come on sweetheart, you know it ain like ..”
“Ain’t like what? How’s about you not call me anymore eh? Thanks and have a great day.”
Now needless to say, I do feel bad for saying that but it felt so liberating at the same time! How dare you think it’s okay to ignore me for almost 2 years and come back because you wanna use me? Flippin’ opportunist. And NO, I do NOT wanna write ANYTHING with you. And YES I know my Blog’s becoming popular but I refuse to let you in on ANY of my ideas and dreams. Didn’t need you then and I certainly don’t need you now. Douche.
Deuces!
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