I have no introduction. The letter should be enough.
Dear Ex:

                I know you miss him. If I were you I’d miss him too. He’s so sweet. And generous and thoughtful. A real gentleman. He opens my doors and sends me flowers for no reason at all. We take long drives and listen to Bruno Mars and Usher. He even sings some of them to me. He loves his family, especially his mom. Their bond is so tight; it’s admirable. He’s a hell of a hard-worker too. When he comes home, I wind up giving him backrubs and a hot meal. Yeah, he’s THAT kind of man. He deserves that. He listens to me when I have something to say. Sometimes just listening because he knows that all I want to do is vent. And our sex? Ha! Definitely something to write home about. His kisses that leave hot wet trails in their wake. Ugh, he’s damn near perfect. And even when he makes me mad as hell, I still want him around! His good EASILY outweighs his bad. Easily.

                You had all of this, but you didn’t want it. You loved it at first I bet, thought he was so perfect but you began to look at your neighbor’s grass. Damn that grass looked green huh? So you stepped on over and helped yourself. Tasted good right? So good you stayed there; nibbling this forbidden fruit. Neglecting your own man, whose love began to slowly wither and die. You came back on occasions, but never long enough though. As soon as you turned your attention to that forbidden fantasy, you just had to make it your reality [if only for a short while]. You knew your man would wait for you, because he loved you.

                Until you fucked it up. Yeah, you were caught and your sweet lies weren’t enough to save you this time. He called it off. You figured this was the best thing so you agreed. After all, you had your green grass now right? You were GOOD! Who the hell needed him anyway?

                Fast forward to mere weeks later. Ugh, this grass tastes like shit. [Too much of a good thing ain’t always a good thing right?] So you slowly ease back into his life. Simple text messages, “Hey, what’s up. Just checking in on ya.” BULLSHIT. You ain’t JUST checkin’ in. You wanna find out if you still have a shot at making this thing work. He returns your text messages but something’s different. He’s not as mushy as he used to be. His “Hey baby” was replaced with “Sup?” You don’t like it so you try even harder but to no avail. What the hell happened?! I’ll tell you what happened.

                I’M what happened. You made it SO easy for me. A REAL woman. Who knows how to see and appreciate a good man while she has him, not after the fact. I’m damn near floored at his appreciativeness. A simple task like running his bath and making sure he’s fed on time. [And I’m not talking about a #6 from Wendy’s either.] He has to be so grateful because he’s never had a WOMAN treat him like this. Matter of fact, he’s never had a REAL WOMAN before. Simple backrubs and scalp massages after a long day. A simple text throughout the day to say “Hey baby, I can’t wait to see you later.” And I have to keep saying SIMPLE because that’s what it is to me; Nothing difficult.

                Then you find out about me. And cue the FIREWORKS! The text messages POUR in. NOW you can say how much you love and need and miss him. But honey bunch, you’re a little too late. He’s had a taste of real and he simply can’t turn back. I mean like the song says, “If you could have Beyonce, would you take Solange?” Yes babygirl, you are the Solange to my Beyonce. A shadow. A mere speck in someone’s mind. Easily forgotten … Ever so easily replaced. So please stop. It’s becoming sad, pathetic and OLD. He doesn’t want you back. And quite frankly, you should be happy. Besides, I am one hard act to follow. I wouldn’t want to come after me either!

Yours Truly,

Loved, Sexed & Satisfied. 

11/23/2010 12:20:23 am

Standing ovation... wish i had this letter bout 10 yrs ago.


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